I've also more or less recovered from my little panic attack last week. Getting this paper out of the way was a big weight off my shoulders, and my teacher in my lit class decided to gice the foreign students an out of class essay instead of an in-class one, which means I don't have a final tomorrow, and I have some time to write the essay (although i would really be a happy camper if he would send us the topic already). I talked with various people at the schools I've been working at about my issues with the teaching job, and they were surprisingly understanding about it all. I guess I should have done it sooner. I think that a lot of the things I was upset about were related to various misunderstandings and lack of comprehension within the system of what my job entailed. And then I managed to talk the whole death thing out with various people, so while I'm still upset, I'm more ok. In talking to my mom, she reminded me that I'm going to be pretty vulnerable over the next 6 weeks because I'm emotionally preparing to leave France (AH!). So I guess maybe I'll have to get used to panicking every once in a while.
On the plus side, the sun has been out for several days now. I've missed most of it because I've been huddled in my little hole working or in class...and having a nocturnal Friday night and being exhausted all day yesterday...I swear if I wake up tomorrow morning to rain, I very well might cry. I have time tomorrow to go sit in a park or an outside café (and do reading homework...I guess it's better than my room though) and go running if my foot is done being lame (I think I sprained it or something in capoeira...it hurt like hell to walk yesterday, another reason I stayed in my room mostly). Things I haven't done in a while.
It's funny to think that less than a week ago I was such an upset mess. Right now I'm actually feeling really good. I mean, I'm still a little stressed, and of course always freaking out a little inside about how much I have to do in 6 weeks, but other than that I really have had a great couple of days. And I'm feeling good about things. Especially if I things work out for going to Grenada next weekend.
Some highlights from this week include writing a 4 page (single spaced) paper on Wednesday and celebrating over some Belgian souvenirs and pizza and watching Napoleon Dynamite with my girlies, who we shall call Fortune Cookie and Silly Thing, which was really good. Then on Friday night the same girls and "the guys," who are Katie's host brother and his friends. Fortune Cookie and Silly Thing had brought the guys presents from Amsterdam, so we all ended up getting together and hanging out sans dormir until like 7am. Well...Silly Thing slept a little and Fortune Cookie kept falling asleep in her chair while we waited for the metro to start running again (and then for croissants and pain au chocolat). Somehow I was wide awake. I guess that probably has something to do with the fact that all the guys had to drink were energy drinks and then we randomly decided to make coffee at like 3 am. I was having quite a good time, though, just chatting with the everyone and laughing at their silliness and chillin. Good times. And so then yesterday I got home at 7am or so and then tried to work on my paper cuz my head was still awake from the caffeine, but my body wasn't having it, so I slept for maybe two hours and then got up and went to the market. I haven't gone to my Saturday market in AGES. I had forgotten how much I like it, and was happy that my vendors hadn't all forgotten me. I really do love that the neighborhood market is like a community. People stand around and chat and get to know each other and it's just so great! I'm really gonna miss that a lot.
Um, I guess that's about it for now. Life is good. La vie est belle.
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